


"Hello Beautiful"

by orphan_account



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Be More Chill - Ned Vizinni
Genre: Anxiety, Best Friends, Depression, Heart Break, High School, M/M, Pining, Suicide, based on a true story lmaooo, basically a story about how having a picture perfect view on someone isnt healthy and ok, bc they might not always be who you think, break ups, grade 9, heavy mentions of suicide and self harm, high school romance bullshit, michael falls in love w an original character, michael is stupidly in love and does stupid shit, michael mell/original characters, original character named Mack, original character named Ronnie Sears, ronnie does stupid stuff to michael, ronnie sears is a cowboy yeehaw, there is boyf riends in this in the end, this is rly nice to write so far bc it makes me feel ok, valentines day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-24 01:14:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Michael and Jeremy are in their first year of High school. Michael falls in love with an eleventh grader named Ronnie. The two start talking and grow closer and all of a sudden, Ronnie does a huge proposal of love for Michael on Valentines Day. Michael can hardly believe it, and in his love struck mind he messes up time and time again and makes a fool out of himself. Ronnie pulls some stupid shit and messes Michael up. Jeremy has to help Michael through the heart break, as well as his friend Mack. Angst and shit ensues. God idk this is based on a real experience just read it





	"Hello Beautiful"

**Author's Note:**

> ok im not going to explain much bc its all in the story but this is based on a 100 percent real experience that happened to me and i guess id just like to kinda get it off my chest using my comfort characters. that plus im also named michael so??? also like, writing this might help me put it into words better? and help me realize it rly wasnt even that bad?? idk 
> 
> anyways there's some original characters in this. One's name is Mack who is best friends w/ Michael and Jeremy and Ronnie Sears who is the *wink wonk* LOVE INTEREST  
> i hope u enjoy im sorry if the ending of this chapter is rushed lmao IT'S JUST..THERE'S A LOT OF SHIT IN THIS STORY I S2G AHHh

When Michael Mell was in grade nine, he had met a boy. This boy was quite known throughout the school, he was important in the theatre club, almost everyone knew him. He had a distinct smile, a smile that could brighten up a dark room. A positive attitude that would make even the saddest person feel somewhat hopeful. An amazing, soft singing voice. This boy was very nice in Michael’s eyes. Michael had painted this picture perfect image of this boy in his head. He believed this boy was all about friendship, and he was in a way, but not in the way Michael has hoped. This boy had promised Michael he doesn’t hate anyone, but the more Michael got to know him, the more he realized that was an utter lie. 

Smiles are deceiving. 

Michael desperately needed someone. Anyone, anyone who would make him feel loved. He was used time and time again. He doesn’t talk about it. 

When Michael is a month into grade nine, he gets his new locker set up. Him and Jeremy would soon begin the habit of hanging out at the locker in the morning. Jeremy didn’t have his own locker, he said he didn’t want one. He regrets it. He uses Michael’s locker for the first half of grade nine. Michael doesn’t mind, it doesn’t serve much use to himself anyway. 

Michael’s gay. This is a well known fact, especially for Jeremy. Jeremy doesn’t care, he’s accepting, he enjoys it. He enjoys sitting in the basement playing video games and listening to Michael go on and on about boys. Michael’s parents know, but that’s about it. Kids from their middle school know, but half of them keep away from the boys. It doesn’t matter. 

Michael falls in love easily. Jeremy’s used to it. He’s used to getting spammed with texts at three in the morning where Michael is obsessing over some boy at school. Jeremy doesn’t feel love that easily. He loves Christine and always has, it pains him to even think of loving someone else. 

Jeremy is Michael’s best friend. They have been for years and Jeremy is no stranger to dealing with Michael’s heart breaks. He’s been there for Michael since they were five years of age. He hugged Michael the day the little boy Michael was just ‘wanting to be friends with’ didn’t keep his mini valentines day card. Michael was heart broken in a childish way. They were kids. 

All this helps perfect what happens next. 

Michael lays his eyes on a taller boy who is at his locker. Michael didn’t mean to lay his eyes on this boy, but his eyes tend to stray. He’s mostly on the lookout for possible assholes to avoid (Michael can identify an asshole from a mile away) or well, cute guys. Michael is always on the lookout for assholes and cute boys. The taller boy catches Michael’s attention and whatever Jeremy is going on about (Christine) is numbed to Michael. Michael can’t detach his eyes from the boy at his locker. The boy turns around, softly shuts his locker, and walks past Michael and Jeremy. Michael shyly takes a better look at the boy and nearly squeals.  
Jeremy notices that something is up and looks at Michael in concern. “Are you...okay?”

The boy is now going up the stairs and leaves. Michael covers his face with his hands and whines. “He was cute, man. He was fucking _cute._ ” 

“Who?”

“T-that-that guy! You know, the one who just passed us! God okay- I need a moment-”

“He was...okay.”

“You’re not gay, you dipshit! What would you know?”

 

“You never know, man.”

“Are you saying you being gay is a possibility?” 

 

Jeremy shrugs and closes his locker. “Stop checking out boys and walk me to my homeroom. I’m scared to go alone.” 

“Why are you scared to go alone?”

“Christine’s homeroom is nearby. She might see me and think-”

Michael tunes it out and walks to Jeremy’s homeroom with him. They unfortunately don’t have the same homeroom, nor any classes together, but it’s not a bother for Michael. So far he’s met a few decent people who help him feel safe without Jeremy around. They stick around Michael and talk to him which makes it easier for his social anxiety. He can’t go anywhere alone without feeling scared, so having people who are nice to him makes it feel a lot less scary. He’s still struggling with their names though. 

Michael can’t stop thinking about the boy at his locker. They were so close to each other! Their lockers! So close! That thought alone is enough to give him butterflies. He can hardly believe it, a cute boy is so close to him!

Everyday since then Michael forces Jeremy to hang out with him at his locker. Michael desperately hopes to see the boy again, but there’s so many new faces that catch his eye that he can hardly remember what the boy looks like. All he remembers about him is he had styled and gelled hair and looked kind of angry. Almost like resting bitch face in a way. 

It takes about a month before he can finally see the boy again, and when he does Michael looks away and tries not to stare. His eyes don’t listen to Michael and next thing he knows, he’s looking him up and down. Jeremy rolls his eyes “why are you making me stand here just so you can check him-”  
Michael covers his mouth in panic. “He might hear you, dude! I don’t want him to know I’m checking him out, because I totally am!” Michael quietly exclaims. 

Jeremy knows that when Michael has a crush on someone, he acts cocky around them. He acts like a show off when they’re nearby and he acts loud and kind of mean. Jeremy’s used to it, the constant pushing and the loud exclaims of how lame Jeremy is just so Michael’s crush can look at them. Jeremy doesn’t care, he knows he himself has quirks when he’s around his crushes. Thing is, Jeremy’s not quite sure what Michael would gain from acting mean to his best friend in front of a crush. If his crush is anything close to decent, he’d stay away from someone who’s mean to his own friend. Jeremy’s tried to tell Michael, but Michael continues it. 

Jeremy prepares himself and takes a deep breath. 

Michael slams the locker loudly and pushes Jeremy a bit “dude you are so weird!” Michael says, nervously glancing at his crush. 

“Weird for what though? I didn’t do anything-” 

“Your shirt! You and your stripes, heh.”

Jeremy rolls his eyes “I don’t know where _that’s_ coming from, but I could say the same about your red sweater!”

Michael makes a noise and throws Jeremy’s backpack at him. “Let’s get to homeroom.” 

Michael then glances at his crush again, before walking past him and Jeremy runs to Michael to catch up. Michael’s face is red. “Someone’s in love” Jeremy teases. 

-

A month later, Michael makes a new friend. The new friend is pretty cool, his name is Mack and he is funny and nice. Mack is a trans guy, which is fine with Michael. He’s accepting of everyone and he loves Mack to death. The two are like best friends already. Of course, he can’t replace Jeremy though. Jeremy loves Mack, too. Jeremy, Michael, and Mack are a little trio of best friends. The three eat lunch together and joke around everyday. Mack is Michael’s ‘social handlebar’ when he’s away from Jeremy. He helps Michael speak in french class, he helps Michael express himself, and even convinced Michael to show pride in being gay. Michael stitched a gay pride flag patch on his red sweater and wears it to school to show Mack. Mack adores it and gives Michael a huge hug. 

Mack is involved in the school musical. Well, not exactly the school musical from what Michael’s learned. It’s similar, but it isn’t exactly the same. It’s basically where people will direct scenes from movies or musicals and redo it at the school. It’s a big stressful event and takes lots of planning. Mack is a director, he’s directing a scene from an old musical. This means Mack gets around a lot and meets the theatre kids. He knows these kids which makes Michael jealous. Michael wants to be a theatre kid himself, but he tries not to give it much thought. He was too late with signing up for it. 

He discusses it with Mack a lot. Mack always mentions this kid who goes by the name of “Ronnie” and who is cute in Mack’s eyes. Mack always sits and gushes about him and how cute he is, how perfect he is, and how funny and kind he is. Michael imagines some fuckboy looking kid and doesn’t give it much thought. He’s not too into the ‘fuckboy’ look so he doesn’t really listen to Mack gush about it. Michael wants to gush about his own crush, but it’s difficult when he doesn’t even know their name. 

“I have a crush, too. He’s near my locker and he’s super cute.” Michael smiles and gets some snacks from his book bag. It’s lunch time and they’re both waiting on Jeremy to get his dorky hot lunch. 

“Is it Jeremy?”

“Well, he’s kind of on my list of cute boys I’d kiss if I could- but no it’s not him.”

“Oh so you do have a thing for Jeremy, then?”

“Yeahhh, don’t tell him though. That’d ruin our friendship.”

“I would never do that. Having the hots for friends is hard and puts you in an awkward position. I’d know. Me and Ronnie are pretty tight.”

“That’s great, but anyway my crush is pretty cute. He has cute hair. I love his fashion. He’s tall, too. God, I wanna know him.”

“Talk to him, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

Jeremy sits down with his hot lunch and groans. “I should start packing my own lunches. Christine gets hot lunch. It’s hell. Plus this shit is gross.” 

Michael and Mack tease Jeremy about Christine and talk about their crushes the entire lunch hour. Michael is eating a sandwich grossly in a joking manner, but while he is doing so his crush passes their table. They make eye contact and Michael feels like he’s going to fucking die. 

-

 

When Michael and Mack became friends it was October. Now it’s almost the end of November and already a lot has happened to Michael. At home his cat he’s had for ten years passed away, leaving Michael in a pretty tough spot for awhile. Thankfully, Mack helped him pull through. At school he becomes known for his artistic talent. Michael doesn’t really give his art much thought. It’s not an important part of his personality and he couldn’t care less if he had to do it forever. It doesn’t define him, but he will do portraits of people every now and again. They’re not very good, but again, it’s just something he does for fun. Another thing that happened was he adopted a new cat. He’s also talked to many new people and has come out of his shell thanks to Mack. He finally feels like he has a voice. 

Jeremy is still his own quiet, nervous, and shy self. It doesn’t really bother him much, though. It doesn’t make him and Michael any less close. 

One day while waiting for class to start, Michael and Mack are leaning against the wall outside the classroom and chatting. Their teacher is taking awhile to show up, so the entire class is outside the room being super loud. Michael and Mack don’t care, it gives them time to chat. 

Suddenly, Michael’s crush passes by. 

“M-Mack-...it’s my crush-”

“That’s Ronnie!”

 

“ _That’s_ Ronnie!?”

“Yes! Oh my god! Michael! You’ll love Ronnie. I’ll try to get you guys to talk someday! He’s great. Though be careful, he comes from a conservative family. He also hates being called cute.” 

Michael frowns a bit. 

“Is he nice?”

“God yeah he is. He can make mean jokes sometimes but like, he’s still really nice.”

“He’s also fucking adorable.” Michael sighs dreamily. 

-

It’s December now, which means Christmas is soon. Michael’s super excited and the entire school is comfortable. In his math class there are Christmas lights strung about and little snowflake decorations hung from the ceiling. Mack is wearing a really comfortable Christmas sweater which has cats on it with light up eyes. It’s really nice on him. Michael smiles and jokes around with Mack about it when math is over with. They go to gym together and sit out on the benches and chat the entire time. 

“Mack, when are you going to introduce me to Ronnie?”

“Well, I could today. You say his locker’s near yours, right?”

“Yeah. I usually have to wait at my locker for Jeremy at lunch time, so.”

“Okay we can go to your locker after gym and wait for Ronnie. He comes to his locker at lunch everyday. You can pretend to be opening your locker and I’ll bring him to you!”

Michael feels butterflies. He’s nervous and a bit excited. 

“S-sounds great, man.”

-

After gym the boys go to Michael’s locker. The number is 109, so it was pretty close to the gym, which is on the bottom floor. Ronnie shows up after all the people getting to their lunch spots clear up and Michael’s heart nearly stops. He’s beautiful and cute and his hair is really nice and oh god Michael is in love. Mack walks up to Ronnie and smiles. 

“Hey Ron-”

“Hey the person who is not a fuck up-!” Ronnie puts an arm around Mack’s shoulders and pulls him close. “How are you?”

“Uh- thanks, I guess. I’m alright, I have a friend I want you to meet.”

Ronnie’s face lights up and he smiles “a friend!?” 

Mack nods and leads Ronnie over to Michael. 

“Ronnie. Meet Mikey. Mikey, meet Ronnie.”

Michael’s not sure he can get words out at this current moment so he does an awkward wave. Ronnie kind of looks a little different up close. A little weird in a way? But in an attractive way?

“Hello Mikey!” Ronnie smiles then turns to Mack and they begin discussing the whole musical thing. Then, that’s how Michael figures out how Mack knows Ronnie. Ronnie is in the same club. 

Michael feels awkward waiting for them to stop talking so he opens his locker and rummages through it while his legs are shaking. His face is super red and he’s sweating. He’s so fucking awkward and he hates it. 

When they are done, Ronnie walks away and Jeremy comes up to Michael. He taps him gently which spooks him and Jeremy laughs. 

“Did you talk to Ronnie or something? I saw him nearby”

“Y-yeah. Mack introduced us, dude! He’s even better up close, god dammit.”

 

-

Not long after meeting Ronnie for the first time, Mack inspires Michael by drawing Ronnie. Michael then wants to start his own drawing of Ronnie. “Are you giving that drawing to Ronnie?” Michael asks with a small blush on his face. Mack nods, concentrating. “If I draw Ronnie, can you give it to him, too?” 

Mack smiles “of course.”

So that night, Michael begins drawing. He doesn’t care how shitty it is. He looks at Ronnie’s Facebook profile picture and starts drawing away. The end product is shit and it looks lopsided, but Michael doesn’t care. He’s still proud and excited. 

The next day at school Mack and Michael go to the locker again. There comes Ronnie, smiling and walking towards Mack. “You said you had a gift?”

“Yeah! I drew you. So did my friend Mikey.” 

Ronnie takes Macks drawing and looks at it and smiles. He holds it close to his chest and makes a content noise. “It’s so good, Mack!” 

Michael shyly looks at his own drawing. He’s afraid. Who knows how Ronnie might react to it.  
Mack takes it gently and gives it to Ronnie. “Here’s Mikeys.”

Ronnie looks at it and his face lights right up and he smiles huge “this-this….this is….amazing, Mikey! Oh goodness, this is so good!” Ronnie holds it close and grabs Michael suddenly and gives him a side hug. “I love it, dude!”

Michael cannot believe what is happening. He’s getting a hug from his crush. He feels everything inside light up, his stomach is fluttering and so is his heart. Oh god, Ronnie smells amazing. He smells like nice deodorant and it’s wonderful. Michael’s face is super fucking red and when Ronnie leaves he cannot stop freaking out. He’s shaking and out of breath and Mack is certain Michael’s going to die, so he makes him sit down. 

That night Michael lies awake at night quietly freaking out. 

-

A few days before Christmas break starts, Michael finds a school newspaper in his desk in Science class. He has a Science test to do, so when he finishes he grabs it and opens it. He sees a written article by Ronnie. Ronnie Sears. He reads it and then gets a brilliant idea. He kind of admires Ronnie in a way. He wants him to _sign_ this newsletter. He looks at Mack and whispers his name. 

“Dude, can you get Ronnie to sign this? I just really like him and it’d be cool to have him sign this.”

“I...could try.” Mack takes it gently and looks at it. His face isn’t entirely convincing.

“Please? For me?”

Mack sighs “it’s a weird request, but sure. You treat him like he’s a celebrity or something.”

Michael’s stomach gets butterflies again. He’s so fucking excited, this is amazing.

-

He gets the signature. Ronnie signed it and his handwriting isn’t nearly as impressive as Michael was hoping, but it’s still great nonetheless. On the last page which contains his article, he put his Instagram. 

Michael cannot believe it. 

His _Instagram._ That meant Pictures of Ronnie. Just Ronnie. God, he’d look at it almost daily. 

Michael reads the part at the back.  
“ _Ronnie Sears.  
Follow my music page: @jacksummersmusic99_ ”

 

Michael nearly fucking screams. He’s so excited and he searches it up almost instantly. Michael barely uses Instagram and he’d never follow it in a million years, but he’s going to stalk the account, that’s for sure. He’s also really glad it’s a music page, like...Ronnie _sings_ and he’s probably fucking good at it. 

He checks the account with Mack and they both freak out over it. Ronnie looks so cute in almost every video. He just has such a nice charm about him that Michael adores. Michael turns up the video and puts the speaker to his ear and listens and it’s amazing! Ronnie sings so good! It’s either he has real talent or Michael’s just in love. Whatever it is, it’s not important. 

When Michael sees Jeremy later that day, he shows Jeremy. Jeremy doesn’t have much input. He’s quiet and shrugs. “I don’t get it, you guys. You all are so obsessed with this kid in our school. It’s weird.”

“You’re one to fucking talk, Jeremy. Jesus.” Mack rolls his eyes.

“Yeah. If Christine had an Instagram dedicated to her acting talents you’d be all over that like nobody’s business…”

Jeremy blushes deeply. “I wrote her a letter…”

Michael raises an eyebrow. 

“I kinda got inspired after I saw you and Ronnie talking. I thought maybe I could try to do something myself.”

“Wow, you gonna give it to her?”

“Probably….”

“Oh?”

“Probably...not…” he sighs. 

Michael smiles “you can do this, man!”

-

It’s January now. Christmas break is over and Michael’s getting himself used to his sleeping schedule again. He sleeps in one day, but that’s it. After that he sleeps just fine and normal. 

Michael hasn’t thought about Ronnie much. He’s just sorta in the back of his mind now. He’s really annoyed that he has to be at school again and is irritable and tired. Though, he’s very happy to see Jeremy and Mack again. He hung out with Jeremy all of Christmas break, but not Mack. He hugged Mack the moment he saw him. Mack got some anime shirts for Christmas and looked pretty happy. It made Michael happy. 

The next few weeks were normal everyday school weeks. Then he had exams, which were pretty annoying. Michael cried hard because he was certain he failed his math exam and would have to repeat the first semester of math. He wasn’t ready for the second semester at all.

There is a break before the second semester starts. It’s about five days long. 

Michael had made plans to hang out with Jeremy but something came up so he spent the weekend at home. Things weren’t going well between his mother and father, they were fighting like cats and dogs. He stays locked in his room and listens to them fight all day and it’s fucking annoying. He can hardly believe it. He goes on his phone and goes to check Instagram and sees Mack posted some art and tagged Ronnie in it. Ronnie’s main account. Ronnie has a main account. 

Michael’s heart flutters and suddenly this sad feeling of loneliness hits him. He really wants to get to know Ronnie and he doesn’t want to let any possible chances of it fly him by. He texts Mack in a panic. 

**Michaelmelon22:** Dude ok i rly wanna be friends w ronnie i cant handle this anymore i want to be his friend 

**MackMackMack:** bro ok chill ill make a groupchat and get u two to talk ok

**Michaelmelon22:** FUCK OKAY

What happened next, Michael was completely surprised by.


End file.
